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I think the worst part of my failed relationships is watching that person fade out of my future memories. Suddenly all the best laid plans don't have anything to stand on. And I think of how scary and lonely that feels and then think of my kids who must have lived that everyday for a time...maybe still do...because of their parents divorcing. And even though experience tells me that this will pass, that I will enjoy being single again and the person I am grieving will someday mean little to nothing to me...it doesn't change that it feels like shit and effects everything about my life. Ugh. Being human, right?
I think the worst part of my failed relationships is watching that person fade out of my future memories. Suddenly all the best laid plans don't have anything to stand on. And I think of how scary and lonely that feels and then think of my kids who must have lived that everyday for a time...maybe still do...because of their parents divorcing. And even though experience tells me that this will pass, that I will enjoy being single again and the person I am grieving will someday mean little to nothing to me...it doesn't change that it feels like shit and effects everything about my life. Ugh. Being human, right?
I think the worst part of my failed relationships is watching that person fade out of my future memories. Suddenly all the best laid plans don't have anything to stand on. And I think of how scary and lonely that feels and then think of my kids who must have lived that everyday for a time...maybe still do...because of their parents divorcing. And even though experience tells me that this will pass, that I will enjoy being single again and the person I am grieving will someday mean little to nothing to me...it doesn't change that it feels like shit and effects everything about my life. Ugh. Being human, right?
Jenny. I don't know you. But...
Super. Big. Hugs.
I'm right there with you. Life sucks, right? I got a helmet.
Post by crazykittensmile on Apr 15, 2014 11:15:56 GMT -5
Being back at work today is the worst. I want to cry and leave. Or leave and cry? Either one.
I have no voice left (and suddenly everyone wants to discuss things over the phone instead of email) and 20 billion emails of multiple things that blew up in the THREE WHOLE DAYS I was gone. Ugh.
I'm pretty sure that the on again off again sore throat I've had the past month has turned into tonsillitis. It's a mild case and can probably be cleared up with some meds but it's still annoying.
Post by krunchykat on Apr 17, 2014 14:08:12 GMT -5
Well, it looks like the partial child support payment I received last week is the last I'm getting. Its not like I got a large amount anyway, but losing it will make tough times even tougher. The horrible part of the whole situation is that my ex has ruined what little life he had built for himself and our 13 yr old daughter has totally written him off and wants nothing more to do with him. Granted, he has never been a great dad and has failed to maintain a consistent relationship with her, but it still has to be tough for her. I just wish I could change something about this entire ordeal.
Edit: I'm sure most of you don't know the back story here. My ex relapsed on meth after being clean for about 10 years. He then got involved in a drug ring and was popped by the feds. He just took the best deal he was offered which is 9 years. Stupid fucking asshole.
Well, it looks like the partial child support payment I received last week is the last I'm getting. Its not like I got a large amount anyway, but losing it will make tough times even tougher. The horrible part of the whole situation is that my ex has ruined what little life he had built for himself and our 13 yr old daughter has totally written him off and wants nothing more to do with him. Granted, he has never been a great dad and has failed to maintain a consistent relationship with her, but it still has to be tough for her. I just wish I could change something about this entire ordeal.
Edit: I'm sure most of you don't know the back story here. My ex relapsed on meth after being clean for about 10 years. He then got involved in a drug ring and was popped by the feds. He just took the best deal he was offered which is 9 years. Stupid fucking asshole.
Ugh that all sucks so much I went through a lot of craziness with my ex and child support/ him not being in her life etc. It's hard to deal with, the lack of support (financially or any other way), and is so very discouraging and spirit breaking. Sorry you are having to deal with this, but you will get through it and so will your daughter, and you will both be stronger and wiser in the end. My daughter is now 22, and she is beautiful, strong, confident, and independent, and I really believe some of those qualities came from dealing with all the crap, and getting through it, together with me. She has hardly any relationship with her father, and has not since her mid-teens. Keep strong girly!!
Well, it looks like the partial child support payment I received last week is the last I'm getting. Its not like I got a large amount anyway, but losing it will make tough times even tougher. The horrible part of the whole situation is that my ex has ruined what little life he had built for himself and our 13 yr old daughter has totally written him off and wants nothing more to do with him. Granted, he has never been a great dad and has failed to maintain a consistent relationship with her, but it still has to be tough for her. I just wish I could change something about this entire ordeal.
Edit: I'm sure most of you don't know the back story here. My ex relapsed on meth after being clean for about 10 years. He then got involved in a drug ring and was popped by the feds. He just took the best deal he was offered which is 9 years. Stupid fucking asshole.
I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this. You are an amazing and strong lady, and you're passing those traits along to your daughter. You are and will continue to be a great role model for her.
This isn't so much a GRRR but I'm not sure where else to put it. Those that are FB friends with me already know but my grandfather passed away on April 1. He had been sick for a while so his passing wasn't much of a shock. Still, my family has mourned and has been moving on with life. My grandmother had been having a difficult time of it, as expected.
And then, yesterday morning, my grandmother suddenly passed away. She just went to sleep and didn't wake up. I mean, we just buried my grandfather two weeks ago and now we are planning to bury my grandmother right next to him. All day yesterday, I kept thinking that this was just a bad dream.... that I would wake up and she would be fine, just like always.
I'm devastated. I've dreaded this day for so many years. My grandmother was more like my mother than my actual mother; she took care of me regularly and helped raise me. My heart just feels flat, like it could be blown away.
If you guys have any good vibes or thoughts or prayers to spare, my family and I could use them. The next few days will be difficult, but the coming weeks will be even harder for us.
And thank you, inforoosters, for always being there when I need you guys most. <3
Post by wannaberoo'ing on Apr 17, 2014 19:22:52 GMT -5
Wow, I'm very sorry to hear all this JHOinTN. That is terrible for you and your family. Thoughts are with you and I am truly sorry for what you are going through right now. Apparently, your Grandma couldn't go on without him?
This isn't so much a GRRR but I'm not sure where else to put it. Those that are FB friends with me already know but my grandfather passed away on April 1. He had been sick for a while so his passing wasn't much of a shock. Still, my family has mourned and has been moving on with life. My grandmother had been having a difficult time of it, as expected.
And then, yesterday morning, my grandmother suddenly passed away. She just went to sleep and didn't wake up. I mean, we just buried my grandfather two weeks ago and now we are planning to bury my grandmother right next to him. All day yesterday, I kept thinking that this was just a bad dream.... that I would wake up and she would be fine, just like always.
I'm devastated. I've dreaded this day for so many years. My grandmother was more like my mother than my actual mother; she took care of me regularly and helped raise me. My heart just feels flat, like it could be blown away.
If you guys have any good vibes or thoughts or prayers to spare, my family and I could use them. The next few days will be difficult, but the coming weeks will be even harder for us.
And thank you, inforoosters, for always being there when I need you guys most. <3
I'm so sorry to hear that Julie. Sending all the good vibes I can conjure.
This isn't so much a GRRR but I'm not sure where else to put it. Those that are FB friends with me already know but my grandfather passed away on April 1. He had been sick for a while so his passing wasn't much of a shock. Still, my family has mourned and has been moving on with life. My grandmother had been having a difficult time of it, as expected.
And then, yesterday morning, my grandmother suddenly passed away. She just went to sleep and didn't wake up. I mean, we just buried my grandfather two weeks ago and now we are planning to bury my grandmother right next to him. All day yesterday, I kept thinking that this was just a bad dream.... that I would wake up and she would be fine, just like always.
I'm devastated. I've dreaded this day for so many years. My grandmother was more like my mother than my actual mother; she took care of me regularly and helped raise me. My heart just feels flat, like it could be blown away.
If you guys have any good vibes or thoughts or prayers to spare, my family and I could use them. The next few days will be difficult, but the coming weeks will be even harder for us.
And thank you, inforoosters, for always being there when I need you guys most. <3
I'm sorry Julie. I'll definitely send good vibes your way.
I love my best friend, but I'm not a fan of the people he hangs out with. He shared a racist joke with me last night one of his friends had told him. I had to send him a message on Facebook asking him not to tell me any more racist jokes and that they're not funny.
Last Edit: Apr 17, 2014 21:15:47 GMT -5 by Deleted - Back to Top
Well, it looks like the partial child support payment I received last week is the last I'm getting. Its not like I got a large amount anyway, but losing it will make tough times even tougher. The horrible part of the whole situation is that my ex has ruined what little life he had built for himself and our 13 yr old daughter has totally written him off and wants nothing more to do with him. Granted, he has never been a great dad and has failed to maintain a consistent relationship with her, but it still has to be tough for her. I just wish I could change something about this entire ordeal.
Edit: I'm sure most of you don't know the back story here. My ex relapsed on meth after being clean for about 10 years. He then got involved in a drug ring and was popped by the feds. He just took the best deal he was offered which is 9 years. Stupid fucking asshole.
That is so tough. Not just the money part, but to see her go through that rejection, disappointment and see her hurt. I can't imagine how that must make you feel. Sending you both good thoughts and love.
This isn't so much a GRRR but I'm not sure where else to put it. Those that are FB friends with me already know but my grandfather passed away on April 1. He had been sick for a while so his passing wasn't much of a shock. Still, my family has mourned and has been moving on with life. My grandmother had been having a difficult time of it, as expected.
And then, yesterday morning, my grandmother suddenly passed away. She just went to sleep and didn't wake up. I mean, we just buried my grandfather two weeks ago and now we are planning to bury my grandmother right next to him. All day yesterday, I kept thinking that this was just a bad dream.... that I would wake up and she would be fine, just like always.
I'm devastated. I've dreaded this day for so many years. My grandmother was more like my mother than my actual mother; she took care of me regularly and helped raise me. My heart just feels flat, like it could be blown away.
If you guys have any good vibes or thoughts or prayers to spare, my family and I could use them. The next few days will be difficult, but the coming weeks will be even harder for us.
And thank you, inforoosters, for always being there when I need you guys most. <3
That is rough stuff. I had a similar relationship with my grandmother. She started having issues then ended up in the hospital where she passed. I was a mess the entire time she was in the hospital and for a bit afterward. Even years later, that time pops into my head sometimes and flattens me for a minute.
JHOinTN, I am so very sorry for your losses. I feel for you, and I'm sending big vibey internet hugs your way.
krunchykat, hang in there. I've had both my dad and stepdad leave my life due to drugs at different point in my life (jail and death, respectively), and it totally sucks. You'll make it through this though, and you and your daughter will be all the stronger for it.
Last Edit: Apr 18, 2014 11:20:31 GMT -5 by Jaz - Back to Top
5.5/four tet, daphni b2b floating points, avalon emerson 5.12/neil young 5.19/mannequin pussy 5.21/serpentwithfeet 5.25/hozier 6.12-16/bonnaroo 6.28/goose 6.29/goose 9.17/the national + the war on drugs 9.23/sigur ros 9.27-29/making time 10.17/air
Today makes 10 years since my childhood friend passed away. He was only 14 and every April & August (his birthday is August 10th) I can't help but listen to some of his favorite music and just think about him. Even 10 years later I still think about him and how hard it was dealing with my first friend who had passed away.
Since his death I've also had at least one friend die every year since. It's like when Chris died it started this curse in my life that didn't lift until two years ago when the curse peaked & my friend who was like a little sister to me died. So this day really brings out a lot of emotions in me and makes me think about a lot of things. I always feel guilty for going out and carrying on with life on this day. I feel like it should be entirely devoted to Chris, because even though I only knew him for 5 years or so he made such an impact on me.
it was created by the devil herself (I'm convinced a man would never be smart or spiteful enough to be the devil...plus he would never remember who/what he was doing)
5.5/four tet, daphni b2b floating points, avalon emerson 5.12/neil young 5.19/mannequin pussy 5.21/serpentwithfeet 5.25/hozier 6.12-16/bonnaroo 6.28/goose 6.29/goose 9.17/the national + the war on drugs 9.23/sigur ros 9.27-29/making time 10.17/air