I have to share this story with the world, and I guess this is the place to start.
Back at home I only drink. But Saturday night at roo I **** until my mouth swallowed my brain and I was holding my arms like T-rex.
That’s when she approached me.
She was this fine lil brunette from Michigan.....that’s all I know of her. I was partying with her on and off throughout the day. My group had gone off on their separate ways and I found myself sitting alone for about 5 minutes. During those five minutes I continued to expand my mind, debauchery was my only goal. That’s when Mrs. Michigan sat beside me, magically all clean and in a pink slutty lingerie type dress. That’s when things went downhill...........hilariously down hill. She asked for a hit so of course I obliged. All I heard next was a “Gush hack coughhh”. Apparently I was so messed up that there was nothing in the *** and I made her smoke ashes which she swallowed (she had skills). Normally this is when a girl would slap me or move on, but she persisted. She went on to tell me that her lips were very dry and that she wished she had something to moisturize them. I responded with an “Oh”. Keep in mind that I was completely oblivious to what she was trying to do. I was in my own world and I just couldn’t catch on. She asked me if I had anything to wet her lips and I said “Can you pass the Oreos” (Dude, I was soooo hungry). A little conversation later and she asks “You look really messed up, you should lie down in your tent”, to which I said “Nah I’m fine”…….She CONTIUNED “You sure you don’t want to lie down in your tent”……”No I’m not tired”, I said. Then like a complete weirdo I stand up and stumble towards that beautiful Ferris wheel (the north star of centeroo). I hear a yell in the distance; “ARNT YOU GOING TO CLOSE YOUR JEEP AND LOCK YOUR STUFF?!?”….”WHO CARES”, I said. I then entered centeroo and had the best brain orgasm of my life. Then I sobered up and realized what I had just missed, but the way it all went down was classic and no bas-tard child will come of it, so it’s all good.